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Archive for 2018


published on: 05.04.2018 in: All entries

“Shall I come sit with you?” I ask my son, who has been 12-yeras-old for 10 hours. He was born at 10.24 in the morning. I couldn’t hold him that morning, my vision was blotched, my hands were shaking, it felt like a knife was cutting through my head, and I had lost 2 litres […]


greatest fear

published on: 14.02.2018 in: All entries

“My mother is sick,” says the 11-year-old boy on the phone, and he hesitates briefly. He says, “sick in the head and in hospital.” I was supposed to meet with her. She had tickets for the opera. I couldn’t reach her. My own son had her son’s number. He confirmed what I already knew. The […]


here now, gone tomorrow

published on: 30.01.2018 in: All entries

Six years old. My father had a surprise for me. We were away for the weekend, there was a rented house, a beach. He told me to come with him and close my eyes. When I opened them I was staring at our car. As I peered into the window, I discovered my best friend. […]


little things

published on: 28.01.2018 in: All entries

On my way to a meeting, I drop by school with his lunch box. I had forgotten to put it into his school bag. He hasn’t yet noticed I had forgotten because I am on time – only just. I can slip it into his school bag and he’ll never know. There are so many […]


so thank you

published on: 22.01.2018 in: All entries

I wander the corridors. There was a presentation, there are drinks. I see faces, people I know, people I’ve worked with, engaged with. They flash forced smiles that say: please don’t talk to me right now, please don’t expect me to be friendly, please know that I am not planning to include you in this […]



published on: 12.01.2018 in: All entries

“It sounds like people are chasing each other,” says my son as we eat and I ask him what he thinks of the music: Mahler’s 1st Symphony. Not that we’re always listening to classical music in our home. The contrary. But I am going to a concert that evening, to hear it. I say, “I […]